“You ARE Always Building YOUR Relationship House”


Today’s post is based on an article that I wrote for the Connection Magazine, a Santa Cruz based publication that is full of inspiring articles offered by all sorts of conscious entrepreneurs.

This post focuses on the discipline of consciously developing and improving our habits around interpersonal interaction.

My wife and I live in the central valley of California.

Spring is in full force here.

The trees are blooming, birds are teaching their babies to fly.

Everywhere I look, life is bursting forth.

I am particularly aware of how thankful I am for my loving relationship with my wife, the great relationship I have with her son, our family ties, and our wonderful circle of friends.

For me, a big part of life is about relationship and connection with others.  This is why I chose to be a love and relationship coach.

My sacred mission is to promote conscious, mutually fulfilling, empowering, loving relationships between as many people as possible.

It is from this perspective that I would like to share some thoughts on building emotional connection.

I have found that one of keys to building and maintaining mutually fulfilling relationships that will stand the test of time is to understand that whenever you are interacting with another human being you are:

  • Either connecting with them, and moving closer emotionally or disconnecting emotionally and moving further away
  • Creating the basis for future interactions
  • Establishing patterns for how you relate to others

You are always building YOUR “relationship house”.

Please take a moment to really let this in.

Our fast paced lives do not promote establishing and maintaining emotional connection.

There is always so much to get done, so many places we need to be, so many responsibilities and the belief that there is not enough time to really connect with one another.

To all of this I would say:
That if we don’t make the time to personally connect with the people in our lives today, we probably never will.

Life is fleeting,

Here today, gone tomorrow.

The time to deepen our interpersonal connections is now.

The easy path to more connected living

If you practice paying attention, being sensitive to the needs and feelings of others, giving people space to express themselves, and so on in all of your interactions, you will be developing habits of thought, speech, and behavior that will serve you when your vested interests require strong emotional connection.

Where as, if you only pay close attention to the needs, feelings, ideas, and so on expressed by others when you feel it is important to do so you will develop the habit of being insensitive and will not be able to really connect emotionally when it is most important to do so.

Cell phones, Ipads, electronic mail and the depersonalization of interpersonal interaction

Call me old fashioned.  Call me reactionary.

However, there is a growing body of research that is beginning to sound the alarm that our kids are growing up in a very “connected”, but increasing impersonal world.

By trying to keep up with everything, we are actually less aware of what’s happening right in front of us.

Now I am not recommending not using all of this technology.

What I am recommending is slowing down, and making our communication more personal.

I am also recommending listening to your heart.

If you feel that someone in your life needs to hear from you, why not simply pick the phone and call them?  It’s not as fast as sending a quick text message but it is more personal.

My “rant is over”.

Still here?

Building emotional connection in romantic relationships

When it comes to romantic relationships, the emotional connections developed during the casual, routine, daily interactions are akin to investing in an “emotional savings account.”

Put another way, if you really pay attention to your sweetie when he/she is just casually talking about this or that, then when the proverbial you know what hits the fan, you have built an emotional foundation that will stand up to the storm.

Think about it.

Remember the story of  “The Three Little Pigs?”
One built his house out of straw.
One built his house out of sticks.
And the third, wise little pig, built his house out of bricks.

So when the cold, hard winds of winter blew, the only house that remained standing was the one built out of bricks.

My point is that if you view every interaction with another human being as important and do your best to pay attention, be curious, show respect, and connect emotionally, then you are consciously developing habits of thought, speech, and action that support all of your relationships.

So, the next time you in the check-out line at the grocery store take the time to connect with the other folks in line, the clerk, the bagger, everyone.

You don’t have to be intrusive, just practice being attentive and connecting.

Help make the world a more positive, connected place – every interaction counts!

Offered in loving support of conscious, mutually fulfilling, empowering loving relationships.

Live, Connect, Love and Prosper

See YOU next week!

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  • Create a sense of clarity about the relationship you really want to have.
  • Find out the essential building blocks for having the relationship of your dreams.
  • Discover the number one thing stopping you from having the relationship you want and deserve.
  • Identify the most powerful actions that will move you toward the relationship of your dreams.
  • Complete our session with the excitement of knowing EXACTLY what to do next to attract a committed partner who truly loves you for who you are!

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Comment by stephen light
May 21, 2013 @ 9:39 am

Beautifully put Ron

We can share love with anyone as it really is who we are.

Love & Courage

Comment by Ron
May 9, 2014 @ 11:27 am

Dear Friend, Thank you for posting such a supportive comment on my blog. I will visit yours soon. Warmly, Ron capocelli

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