Thoughts From My Morning Walk, Time for ‘Some Spring Cleaning’


As many of you know, I can be a very introspective person.

This tendency generally serves me but can also become a breeding ground for negative self-judgments.

One way I process my thoughts, inspirations, and ‘find my path’ in life is through daily walks in the beautiful apple orchards near or home.

This morning I had a realization that helped me let go of some negative self-judgments about ‘getting things right’.

Curious about what I learned?

Yesterday my wife and I had what amounted to an emotionally difficult and deeply inspiring day.

It began with a very powerful fellowship service that called us to action on two very important fronts:

  • Universal access to potable water
  • Supporting struggling youth in their quest for higher education

We then visited a community of friends (14 total) who are facing possible displacement from land and residences, many of whom have called ‘home’ for almost 30 years.

During our drive home following our visit, my wife and I reflected on the difficulties our friends are facing, as well as our own lives.

Upon our return home, more deeply inspiring conversation transpired, leaving us both feeling great gratitude for our mutually fulfilling, loving relationship, and the countless blessings we have in our lives.

The impact of these events on my consciousness set the stage for the inspiration I am about to share.

The question came to me:

Why has it taken ME so long to really get what is most important in life?

Yes, at first there was a tone of negative self-judgment, but through the Grace of God this quickly gave way to what I will call ‘self-tenderness’ or ‘self-directed compassion’

So what has all of this got to do with your love life?

When it comes to love, ‘the land of relationship regret’ has a 24 hour easy access pass while the ‘land of self-empowered reflection’ seems to require high priced, advance-purchase only tickets!

Sound familiar?

So what’s the trick?

How does one transform self-imposed questions that have the potential to leave us deflated and negative into ones that can lead to inspiring, empowering action?

Some ideas follow.

Be sure to let me know what you think, by posting a comment on my blog.


What, be patient with myself?

Yes.  I invite you to give yourself advance permission to be patient with yourself.

As my Mother used to say, “Rome was not built in a day”.

It has taken us our entire lives to:

  • become the person we are today
  • create the circumstances that form the context of our lives.

While it would be nice if the parts of our lives that we are currently dissatisfied with would instantly respond to our attempts to ‘turn things around’, we all realize that this is not how life works.

I would like to point out that this is actually to our advantage.

Really…. How so?

Think about what a mess our lives would be if we could just instantly change ourselves and circumstances.

And you thought that the stock market was hard to predict…. At least us humans live with some consistency!

Positive, lasting life change requires patient, inspired, consistent action.

I invite you to give yourself time and space to get it right!

Be gentle with yourself

Since things take time, I invite you to replace any and all self-deprecating thoughts with positive affirmations that acknowledge your efforts, talents, and progress.

Here’s one I created for me to use when my ‘bean counter voice’ tries to get the upper hand.

“I have worked hard to create a coaching business that truly serves mankind; I see the fruits of my work in all of the wonderful Clients I have the privilege of serving.”


Now it’s your turn!

Got it.  Now write your affirmation on a post-it and put it on your bathroom mirror!

Some final thoughts

Realization is a process, not an event.

We get things, when we get things.

Since the issues that matter most have many facets, and since there is a natural tendency to simply avoid thinking about the ‘hard stuff’, sometimes it takes a long time to get to the bottom of a particular issue.

Allow yourself the gift to take your time to get it right!

I invite you to support our community by posting a comment on my blog.  The thing YOU share could help someone to take their next big step.


See You next week.

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Comment by Stephen Light
April 17, 2012 @ 7:26 am

Thank you Ron

As Frances and I are packing up our lives and moving to a nbew country we have been swamped with ‘doing’ and your gentle reminder that it is a process and a journey so be kind to ourlsevs is apt.

God Bless

Comment by Stephen Light
April 17, 2012 @ 7:26 am

Thank you Ron

As Frances and I are packing up our lives and moving to a nbew country we have been swamped with ‘doing’ and your gentle reminder that it is a process and a journey so be kind to ourselves is apt.

God Bless

Comment by Alan Roby
April 17, 2012 @ 4:46 pm

Ron, Thanks for the invitation for each of us to be botho patient and gentle with ourselves. That really resonated with me today as I read your words. Thanks!

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