The Inner Work of Love


Last week’s post focused on the foundational importance of cultivating the core quality of gratitude in your quest for love and fulfillment.

What we appreciate, appreciates.

I noted that once you have made the unwavering commitment to achieving your relationship goals and thereby enlisted the support of the universe, it is up to you to cultivate the positive attitudes that keep you moving toward your relationship goals.

This week’s post will provide some ideas for you to consider as well as some areas of your inner world that may require some gentle, loving attention.

With Valentine’s Day literally just around the corner I invite you to join the discussion on the Inner Work of Love.

Who knows, you just might come away with an inspiring insight or two that will support your efforts to “get it right” this time!

Tom Robins put it beautifully:

“We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.”

Love is a collaborative, creative process.

As my beloved Mother used to say, “It takes two to tango”.

Since creative processes start with inspiration, and since we all view the world from a very diverse range of perspectives, this discussion must start with you!

Two questions come to mind:

What inspires you to seek love?

What inspires you to give love?

Please take minute to ponder these questions.

As many of you know, I am fond of journaling as a tool for self-discovery.  I highly recommend journaling about what inspires you to seek and give love.

After all, it is a good idea to be aware of what motivates us, especially when it comes to something as life consuming as committed, romantic love.

The deeper you go with these questions, the more clarity you will have on what actually floats your love boat.

Why bother?

Several reasons come to mind.

First, I feel that it is important to balance all of the media and cultural hype around Valentines Day with some personally derived clarity about why you’re even in the game to begin with.

Second, there is a basic principle in human psychology that bears mentioning: humans naturally seek consistency.

We all respect and even admire folks who ‘walk their talk’.

When our actions are in alignment with our values we are able to achieve high levels of fulfillment and have peace of mind.

In order to be fully true to ourselves in matters of the heart, we must first know exactly where we stand.

I probably don’t have to tell you that failing to be true to our deepest values can cause a lot of needless suffering, especially when it comes to matters of the heart.

Finally, in order to build a lasting alliance with the love of your life you need to clearly understand your own motivations, desires, and beliefs around love and committed relationships.

Self-development is an inside job

I encourage you to do the ‘inner work of love’

Some areas of your inner life that may require a little gentle, loving attention

  • Forgiveness
  • Fear of failing again in love
  • Belief that you are not sufficiently attractive/handsome to attract the perfect partner for you


“Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself”  Suzanne Somers

I encourage you to give your self the gift of forgiveness.

I invite you to:

  • Do the ‘soul searching’ necessary to forgive those you feel have injured you

You can accomplish this by making a list of everyone that you believe has injured you and one by one, as you’re ready, forgive each person on your list.

Don’t Leave God off of your list, He’ll understand!

  • Do the ‘soul searching’ necessary to forgive yourself for your own self-injury.

Simply make a list of all the ways that you feel you have somehow ‘failed yourself’ and when you’re ready forgive yourself for each ‘infraction’.

Fear of failing again in love

“If fear is cultivated it will become stronger, if faith I cultivated it will achieve mastery.”  John Paul Jones

From my perspective we are always nurturing or reinforcing our habits of thought and emotion.

I encourage you to proclaim your future success in love and let go of any, and all, thoughts that even imply that you can’t be successful this time around.

You have a very clear choice: work on your own self-mastery or simply resign yourself to the idea of living with the fear of failing in love again for the rest of your life.

The choice is here now, for you to make.

I encourage you to get the support that you need and deserve to get this done.


Belief that you are not sufficiently attractive/handsome to attract the perfect partner for you

“As a man thinketh in his heart, so he is”  Unknown

No shades of grey here either.  If you choose to hold onto the belief that you are not attractive, the love of you life will never see you for the beautiful/handsome person that you already are.


To attract your true love, you must be willing to be fully seen for who you are in this moment.

Get up and go look in the mirror and celebrate the wonderful, wise, and attractive person that you are.

For women:

Get in touch with every aspect of your beauty, sensuality, wisdom, and passion for love.

For men:

Accept that you are worthy of respect and get in touch with the power that energizes your sexual drive, anchors your wisdom, and motivates you to seek a committed life partner.

You are everything that your true love wants, needs, and deserves just as you are.

Self-development is an inside job

I encourage you to do the ‘inner work of love’

An invitation

Once a month or so I offer my services at special rates to my subscribers.

The fist two folks who sign up for my low cost Committed Partner Breakthrough session before the end of the month of January will receive a 10 percent reduction on the coaching program of their choice.

To sign up for your low cost Committed Partner Breakthrough Session, just click on the sign up now button on the upper right-hand corner of my Home Page.

So if you’re ready to make the unwavering commitment to attract your true love I encourage you to take advantage of the opportunity life has put on your doorstep.

If not now, when?

Live, connect, love, and prosper.

See you next week

Start now with a low cost ‘Committed Partner Breakthrough‘ session

During your low cost “Committed Partner Breakthrough Session” we will:

  • Create a sense of clarity about the relationship you really want to have.
  • Find out the essential building blocks for having the relationship of your dreams.
  • Discover the number one thing stopping you from having the relationship you want and deserve.
  • Identify the most powerful actions that will move you toward the relationship of your dreams.
  • Complete our session with the excitement of knowing EXACTLY what to do next to attract a committed partner who truly loves you for who you are!

You will be guided through the steps for setting up your low cost session when you click on the ‘Sign Up Now’ button below:

Sign Up Now

1 Comment »

Comment by stephen light
February 1, 2013 @ 1:45 am

Dearest Ron

Only now do I fully get the quote:

“We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.”

It was in front of me all the time. Thank you

Love & Courage

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