Online Dating Profiles, Less is Often More


Today’s post was inspired by a conversation that I had with a female coaching colleague.

The last time I checked, over forty million people were registered with online dating services.

People naturally put a lot of effort into their online dating profiles in the hope that they will get inquires from people who at least share similar lifestyles, goals, and relationship aspirations.

Something I’ve noticed

Some people go into exhaustive detail about themselves, lifestyle, family history, their favorite pet(s), religious beliefs (world-view), what they bring to a relationship and what they expect from a potential partner add infinitum.

While deep self-examination is very useful in helping you get clear on your values, beliefs, and what’s really most important to you as a person, these sort of personal details do not belong in an online dating profile.

It can be very overwhelming and drive sensitive, well-intentioned men that might be a perfectly good match away. 


Save this sort of self-expression for your journal!

What some men have shared about online dating profiles:

  • Some online profiles are just too long and personal.  Too much information!!!
  • Another common complaint from men about online dating profiles is that they feel that they could never live up to the relationship expectations expressed.
  • Worse yet, some men come away with the distinct feeling that they could never be in a committed relationship with so and so because they don’t believe that they would be left in any freedom to be the men that they are.

What I recommend doing instead:

When it comes to online dating profiles less is often more.

I recommend being completely honest and authentic.  I also recommend being concise and to include the following:

  • A recent headshot that you feel depicts the person that you really are, glamor shots are not the real you!!!
  • Your relationship status. i.e.: single, separated, divorced, widowed, and so on.
  • If your religious orientation, spiritual beliefs or world-view is important to share, be very brief.  For example, I might share that I am a self-aware, spiritually oriented person and leave it at that.
  • Five activities you enjoy sharing with others.
  • Your five most salient values.
  • Five things that you bring to a committed, mutually empowering relationship.
  • Five things you are looking for in potential committed partner- it is equally important to communicate that you are open to possibility.  You want to avoid painting yourself in a corner.

Consider YOUR online dating profile from the perspective of the result you are trying to achieve- you would like a man with similar interest and relationship aspirations to contact you to further explore a potential relationship.

Online dating profile = snap shot of you as a person

Make it easy for people to remember you in a positive light.

Deciding who to contact is a choice that involves a process.

Less detail in your profile makes it easier to remember and reflect on, which, in turn, makes the decision to take the next step and contact you easier.

A few more things to consider:

  • Let go of all fear that you will omit anything from your profile that would attract true, lasting love.  As Gerald Jampolsky once said,

“Love is letting go of fear”.  Then write from your heart.

  • Stand fully in your radiant feminine beauty, power and wisdom.
  • When writing your profile, it is important to balance belief in your self with genuine humility- YOU are ‘a catch’, but give him the joy of discovering that for himself!
  • Ask two close friends, one female and one male, to read your profile and give you some feedback before you post it.
  • Once you post your profile, trust that the universe will conspire with you to bring you positive relationship opportunities.
  • Be patient!!!!  Take YOUR time and get it right this time.


When it comes to online dating profiles, less is often more.

The purpose of online dating profiles is to allow someone to quickly ascertain if you might be a potential partner.

By writing a brief, honest and authentic profile you are helping potential dating partners to get a glimpse of who you are and what you are about.

Online dating profile = snap shot of you as a person

Make it easy for potential dating partners to remember you.

Make it easy for people to take the next step and contact you.

Let go of all fear about not succeeding.  Leave space in your heart and mind for what’s possible.

Be patient!

Time to write or revise your online dating profile.

Time to stand up and shine!

I sincerely hope that you found this post inspiring and useful.

I welcome your comments and questions.

I am here if you need me.

Live, Connect, Love and Prosper

See YOU next week!

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  • Find out the essential building blocks for having the relationship of your dreams.
  • Discover the number one thing stopping you from having the relationship you want and deserve.
  • Identify the most powerful actions that will move you toward the relationship of your dreams.
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