It’s No Laughing Matter

Sometimes in life, we realize that we just take ourselves too seriously.

When it comes to intimate relationships, our struggles, if seen from the outside, might make a good script for a screenplay or better yet, a comedy.

Hey, I could have won some Oscars for a good number of my performances on the ‘stage of love’!

As a coach, my job is to ask questions and question answers.  The resulting dialogue generally leads to insight and inspired, original and previously un-thought-of action.

I have lost count of the number of times that my Clients have come up with incredible, yet unseen, solutions to life’s challenges.

Are YOU curious to find out a pivotal question that if given serious consideration, may actually lead to an inner shift that could be, dare I say it, life changing?

The question is:

When are you unable to laugh at yourself?

This question may elicit some immediate responses.

More often than not, it leads to an ‘inner’ questioning of some things that we do, say, fail to do, fail to say, etc that really get ‘under our skin’.

Very often, we are so embarrassed, that we find it difficult to even recall our actions in these ‘challenging’ situations.

An example from my own life may help to clarify how ‘being able to laugh at yourself’ can help you to be more at ease around your own expectations.

As some of you know I have played drums semi-professionally since I was 14 years old.

I have always taken great pride in my ability to get it right the first time.

On one occasion, I was at Prairie Sun Recording Studios in northern California working on a long awaited 3 song demo with The Backpages, a blues-rock band that was ‘hot’ in the S. F. Bay Area.

The first song we worked on was one of our signature songs that we played at every gig that none of us could get through without making a mistake.

I was especially guilty and kept playing through several of the breaks.

Finally, we took a break.

The bass player, Doug, asked me to step outside for ‘some fresh air’, “Ronnie Cap … let’s take a break.”

Now Doug and I had become good friends.

So out the door we went.

Doug handed me a beer, opened one for himself, and after some back and forth banter said, “Ronnie Cap, if you stop messing up, then so will I”.

His comment, and especially how he delivered it, just struck me as ‘funny’.  Doug knew that it would.

The truth is that I was ‘messing up’ far more than anyone else.  But his comment got me to laugh at myself.

In fact, we both had a good laugh over how many times, the good David Bergin (our fearless Producer), had to tell the engineer to stop and re-roll the … tape machine.

Now what had been utterly embarrassing, became comic relief.

Back in the studio we went.  We nailed the rhythm section tracks of our signature song on the very next take.

The rhythm section of the next two songs were done in 2 takes.


Being able to laugh at myself released the stress of the situation and allowed me to just relax and groove.

This is before I had gotten my ‘Mr. Perfectionist’  voice under control!

Does my sharing bring up any times that you are unable to laugh at yourself?

I find this question so powerfully revealing that I recommend journaling on it every night for a week.

Longer if productive.

For me, fear of failure can put me in a space where I am unable to laugh at myself.

How about you?

If you take to heart your journaling on the question: ‘When are you unable to laugh at yourself?’, I guarantee that you will discover some important things about yourself.

Give it a try and see what comes up for you!

If you discover something really transformational, please feel free to share it with our community by posting a comment on my blog. Your insight may really help some take an important step toward a deeper level of self-acceptance and self-love.

So, please share!

See YOU next week.

Start now with a low cost ‘Committed Partner Breakthrough‘ session

During your low cost “Committed Partner Breakthrough Session” we will:

  • Create a sense of clarity about the relationship you really want to have.
  • Find out the essential building blocks for having the relationship of your dreams.
  • Discover the number one thing stopping you from having the relationship you want and deserve.
  • Identify the most powerful actions that will move you toward the relationship of your dreams.
  • Complete our session with the excitement of knowing EXACTLY what to do next to attract a committed partner who truly loves you for who you are!

You will be guided through the steps for setting up your low cost session when you click on the ‘Sign Up Now’ button below:

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