Commitment in Romantic Love


Happy New Year!!!

Last week’s post focused on the importance of developing a clear vision of both your ideal romantic partner and your imagined life with that special person.

The power of imagination as a creative force in human endeavor cannot be overstated.  Consider this now famous quote by Albert Einstein:

“Imagination is more important than knowledge.”

This week’s post will explore some ideas on the topic of commitment in romantic relationships.

So whether your single and looking or already in a committed, romantic relationship, this post is calling you!

Some thoughts and statistics

Before I dive into the real meat of this post I would like to briefly share some statistics and thoughts relevant to our discussion.

A recent review of the statistical data on marriage and divorce in America released by the PEW Research Center titled: No reversal in the Decline of Marriage (Nov. 20, 2012) cited some statistics that clearly indicate a continued trend away from traditional marriage in America.

Over 50% of all first marriages end in divorce.

According to the National Health and Statistics Report (Number 49, March 22, 2012) there are now over 40 million folks registered in on-line dating programs, all (those who are not scammers!) seeking the people to date.

My take on what all of this means:

Our materially oriented western culture seems to be becoming more and more obsessed with the superficial: physical beauty, ‘sexual variety’, and the seemingly endless push for ‘more’ and ‘better’.

It seems that in our modern western society we tend to view romantic relationships from the same perspective as we do used cars.

If we get tired of the one we are driving –we’ll just trade it in on a different model.

Add to all of this that many people stay in very dysfunctional and even abusive romantic relationships simply because they feel stuck.

As a love and relationship coach who supports committed, loving, mutually fulfilling relationships I believe that it is important to really take a serious look at how we view commitment.

What follows are simply some questions to ponder.

1) If you are dating or considering re-entering the dating scene, do YOU have an “exit strategy”?

Many folks of both sexes who are in new relationships have frequently told me, often in great detail, exactly what they have planned to do if things don’t ‘work out’.

They even often ask me how they might “more fully protect themselves”.


I call such contingency plans exit strategies.

If you have an exit strategy it means that you are simply not fully committed to your partner.

What is this discussion bringing up for you?

Do you need to have a talk with yourself?

Do you need to have a talk with your partner?

2) What are YOUR views on finances and committed romantic relationships?

For me, the recent and steady rise in ‘prenuptial agreements’ reflects that many people appear to value their material assets more than the people they claim to love. 

From my world-view, such contingency plans are fear based and have no place in a marriage agreement.

Mixing the fear of losing everything with the deep, life long commitment of marriage – ‘Till death do we part’- is like trying to mix water and gasoline.

What you end up getting is a mixture that is both extremely volatile and, for all practical purposes, useless!

If you are that attached to your wealth and material possessions perhaps it simply better to stay single or live separately.

Why marry someone if you are that afraid that she/he will take you to the proverbial cleaners if you can’t make things work.

What’s popping up for you?

I highly recommend Lynne Twist’s book, ‘The Soul of Money’, to all of my subscribers who want a fresh perspective on finances, wealth, power, and social responsibility.

True commitment- to anything or anyone- means that you are all in!

I invite you to explore your views on commitment and if you are actively dating or in a committed relationship, to invite your partner to join with you in exploring this important topic.

‘Real relationships’ require ‘real’ discussions.

No time like the present to explore what’s important.

The love you save, may be your own!

Be sure to tune in next week when I discuss ‘The Power of Unwavering Commitment’

Thanks for tuning in, see you next week!

Start now with a low cost ‘Committed Partner Breakthrough‘ session

During your low cost “Committed Partner Breakthrough Session” we will:

  • Create a sense of clarity about the relationship you really want to have.
  • Find out the essential building blocks for having the relationship of your dreams.
  • Discover the number one thing stopping you from having the relationship you want and deserve.
  • Identify the most powerful actions that will move you toward the relationship of your dreams.
  • Complete our session with the excitement of knowing EXACTLY what to do next to attract a committed partner who truly loves you for who you are!

You will be guided through the steps for setting up your low cost session when you click on the ‘Sign Up Now’ button below:

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Comment by williamtrimpi
January 9, 2013 @ 8:52 am

very well put Ron; i have been tied to $ fears in regards to my spouse, and as i am freeing up and becoming present in my life owning my lack of commitment to presence and subsequently partner is clearing the path–Take care-Bill

Comment by Liza
October 9, 2016 @ 4:19 am

I love this post (and many of your others) because it’s in total alignment of my thinking and beliefs. I love your discussion of fear and fear-based behaviors and attitudes citing prenuptials and “exit strategies. ” In the 80’s a college friend recommended I read Jerald Jomplowski’s, “Love is Letting Go Of Fear” and “Love is The Answer” among his others. I think it’s prerequisite reading for those who may not understand the many faces of fear and love and how it manifests in our day to day lives, especially in our dating and other love type relationships. What you’ve so eloquently shared here and in your other posts i think will be much more appreciated and understood with these these books under one’s belt.

I appreciate your insight and wisdom and refer to your work / writings in my own practice as well as with personal friends. I will be checking back frequently. Thank you, again. Namaste! Liza

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